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Gaming Date Night: How to Play With Your Non-Gamer Partner (Without Ruining It)

Fred
Fred · · 7 min read

This article contains affiliate links. If you buy something through these links, we may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you. We only recommend stuff we’d actually use. If digital gaming with a non-gamer partner keeps stalling, physical games often work better. Our list of two-player board games for date night leans on that alternative. Gaming Date Night: How to Play With Your Non-Gamer Partner (Without Ruining It) My wife used to not be into gaming. When we started dating, she’d politely watch me play Uncharted for about fifteen minutes before finding something else to do. Gaming was “my thing” and that was fine. But I kept thinking: this hobby brings me so much joy. We share everything else. Why not this? So I tried. I bought It Takes Two. I handed her a controller. I explained the buttons. It was a disaster. Not because of her. Because of me. I was so focused on sharing my hobby that I forgot to make it actually enjoyable for her. I was correcting her button presses. Sighing when she missed jumps. Basically being a backseat gamer in a two-seat game. We stopped after thirty minutes. She hasn’t picked up a controller since. That was two years ago. I’ve thought a lot about what went wrong and how I’d do…

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FAQ

What game should I start with if my partner has never played video games before?
Untitled Goose Game is the best entry point. You're just a goose moving around and honking, it only needs one stick to move and one button to honk. It's funny, there's no real failure state, and the two-player co-op mode lets you work together while your partner learns the basics.
Why did the author's attempt to play It Takes Two with his wife fail?
He was correcting her button presses and sighing when she missed jumps instead of letting her enjoy the experience. Once you take over the controller or criticize their gameplay, you've communicated that you don't think they can do it, which kills the fun immediately.
Is Overcooked a good game to play with a non-gamer partner?
It can work, but with a big caveat, only stick to the early levels. Higher levels get stressful with time pressure, which can frustrate a new player. Keep it fun and stop before frustration builds, even if you don't get three stars on every level.
What should I do if my partner gets stuck on something during gameplay?
Don't grab the controller. Ask if they want help and wait for them to actually ask for it. Pointing out every mistake adds pressure and signals you don't believe they can figure it out themselves.
Can my partner progress to harder games like Portal 2 or Baldur's Gate 3 if they start with beginner games?
Absolutely, but only after they've built comfort with controllers through Tier 1 games like Stardew Valley or Untitled Goose Game first. Games like Portal 2 require spatial reasoning and camera control, so they're better as a natural next step once your partner feels confident holding a controller.

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Fred
Fred LEVEL 1

Fred has been gaming since his dad brought home a recycled PC from work and installed Hugo's House of Horrors as a toddler. He continues to play games almost daily across PC, console and mobile and may have a slightly addictive personality.

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